Self-Care Protocols
Self-care protocols are essential for our health as parents and caregivers. We give so much to others that we become depleted, exhausted, burned out, and sick. Sure, many of us learn to run on empty for long periods of time before crashing however we may accumulate severe health alignments in the long run. Our well-being is of the utmost importance because of the amount and intensity of our loads. Self-care is not a luxury; it is a requirement for our long-term survival. I cannot stress enough the importance of prioritizing rest, relaxation, exercise, play (fun), internal reflection, downtime, eating properly, and doing things that light you up and feel good.
As parents and caregivers of children with Special Needs, most of us work a job as well as take care of household duties, health care needs for our Special needs child(ren), bills, making meals, doing the shopping, homework, driving to therapy, organizing outings, dealing with paperwork and different systems that are being used for the disability and the list goes on. Sometimes it feels like there aren’t enough hours in the day, so we cut back on our needs. This can breed a lot of resentment over time because we are so out of balance and drained. This is not easy to do, and I know firsthand how difficult it can be to keep up with self-care. However, it is just as important as breathing; it’s not about beating yourself up trying to meet demands. This is learning how to integrate your needs, so you are not just living to take care of others.
Here are some great resources I have implemented in my daily routine:
Breathwork: This is important because it releases stress from the body, it helps to regulate hormones, and decreases COTISOL in the body. This helps me to be calm, centered, and grounded. I sleep deeper, I deal with stressful situations so much better. My mind feels less chaotic and much sharper. I use Wim Hoff’s technique. He gives great instruction and gives his journey and how it has helped him through great loss and grief.
Meditation: This is extremely important to overall health and well-being. While meditation may seem like a foreign concept it has some significant effects on the mind, body, and spirit. Meditation has helped me through PTSD and severe anxiety. It has slowed me down, so I am not running in 10 different directions at one time. I don’t take other people’s insults or judgments personally anymore (I recognize them as self-projections not related to me). It is much easier to articulate myself in a stressful situation. I am more open and peaceful. I also integrate Prayer into my meditation practice. There are so many good meditations on the market, and I have used many over the years. I love Emily Fletcher, especially for beginners. She is world-renowned for teaching powerful tools for meditation. She is also a part of MINDVALLEY.
Daily Energy Routine: This is a set of short exercises that help to cross the brain, strengthen the body’s natural defense system, build the immune system, give vitality, strength, and inner clarity. I do my best to follow through daily as much as possible. I tend to be very sensitive to other people’s energy which can be overwhelming in large groups; although I have noticed that I no longer experience that after doing the Daily Energy Routine. Donna Eden’s Daily Energy Routine.
Yoga/Walking and Exercise: This is so helpful for releasing stress. I personally do Yoga, walk, and or hike. This helps tremendously in my overall thought process. I don’t have much time, so I do yoga at home. I make the time to do these things because I function so much better. Any type of exercise will be highly beneficial. We raise the endorphins when doing different forms of exercise/yoga or dance.
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Tai Chi: Tai Chi is a low-impact exercise that involves slow movements, deep breathing, and meditation. Regular practice improves balance, flexibility, and strength, and reduces stress and anxiety. It's beneficial for people of all ages and fitness levels and can be practiced anywhere without special equipment.
Grounding: I love to do this first thing in the morning and randomly throughout the day. Grounding helps to keep me connected to the earth and my body. When we are in our bodies, we are more present and aware of what’s happening at the moment. We tend to make better decisions with clarity and trust as opposed to fear and confusion. We tend to be more aware and open to opportunities we might otherwise miss. There are several ways to ground. The easiest way is to walk barefoot on grass or on the soil for about 10 mins or longer. Sitting under a tree with your back against the trunk for 20 mins or more is great. Sitting anywhere with your feet on the floor while imagining you have a root that comes out from your spine and each foot going directly into the Earth down to the core. Imagine that as your roots are traveling through the soil you can feel the dampness and the temperature. Spiraling down until you come to the hot moist core, see your roots spreading out in all directions. Breathing deeply and slowly remaining here for about 10 minutes. I release any stress or anxiety down through my roots seeing it burn up in the Earth's fire at the core. This has been highly beneficial for peace of mind.
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Here are some ideas for weekly or monthly that I find to be important.
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Talk therapy, Coaching, or Support Group: This is so important for our well-being. We deal with so much from sleepless nights, Seizures (traumatic watching your child go through) behaviors, being hit, slapped, punched, kicked, and bit. We deal with all the health issues plus worrying if our child might die from the next seizure. Not to mention dealing with outside institutions, such as schools, SSI, Disability Services, healthcare system. This is living in a state of trauma every day. Many of us acquire PTSD and leaving it unchecked can cause major health problems. We also tend to isolate ourselves more because of the intensity of our situations. It is also imperative for us to set up support systems for ourselves. My son’s father and I did this alone because we didn’t have a family. It has taken its toll.
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Massage: We store so much tension in our bodies that our muscles become tight. This will pull things out of alignment which can cause pain. Massage is important for healing touch, nurturing the body, restores balance and relaxation which is imperative for the tough journeys we are on. This is important to do at least once every 2 weeks or weekly. Money may be tight, however, there are a lot of therapists out there that are willing to reduce their prices when they are aware of your circumstances.
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Cranial Sacral Therapy/Myofascial release: This helps with deeper sleep, reducing pain, anxiety, stress, tension, and emotional and mental clarity. Releasing trauma in the body and in the mind. This is great for rebalancing the body. Read more at The Upledger Institute.
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Sound Healing with Bowls and Tuning Forks: This is fantastic for moving and releasing blocks in the body, mind, and spirit. Sound healing creates new neural pathways in the brain and corrects imbalances. This is helpful in restoring balance, releasing trauma, deeper sleep, clarity, and overall well-being.
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Acupuncture: This is a great modality for increased wellness, health, and vitality. Acupuncture was a saving grace for me, especially when things were intense. I would collapse in exhaustion then receive treatment and feel like a whole new person. This modality clears blockages in the body and mind and then rebalances and strengthens the system.
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Trauma and family Constellation work/ collective Constellation: Subconscious bonds and loyalties exist in every aspect of our lives. Constellation work reveals ancestral entanglements and frees us from their painful control. This helps us to do our inner work making it possible to set important boundaries shifting to our own personal truths and expanding our consciousness. We may also shift old patterns, beliefs, and blocks much easier by doing the healing for our ancestors as well as our children. It's a win-win.